Please don't stop coming home because we're trying to kill you.
- Julie

You, my dear, are on some form of narcotic, I think.
- Monica

Thank you for not shaking your hair.
- Felisa

Diana: So what would everyone do [in heaven]?

Kelly: Research.

...remind me to tell you about the time I got propositioned by an Iraqi cabinet minister at work.
- April

I'm a very nice girl, I'll have you know. You know, I think I need to tell everyone that. It might not be immediately obvious.
- Monica

Diana: "Ain't no woman like my woman, so there ain't no other man I'd rather be."

Monica: Quite frankly, I can't wrap my mind around that statement.